I Just Want to Fit In... (Private Thread)

[bullseye14]

The lonely, dust covered mare trudged through the dying grass and moved toward the large, bending river. Gratefully, she stuck her nose in the water, quenching her immense thirst in several deep, drawn out draughts. Celeris then raised her head, looking around the unfamiliar land. Many horses were in the vicinity and she had almost moved past the land to search for another, but her thirst had overwhelmed her and she had given in to the desire for some rest. She knew she would be awkward around wild horses, thanks to the fact that she had lived most of her life in captivity. The bickering, chittering domestic mares were nothing like the wild mares she had occasional memory flashes about. Wild mares were more, well, wild than the horses she had grown to like back at the ranch. An exhausted sigh escaped her lips as she scanned her eyes over the strange horses.
There were stallions and mares here. Stallions frightened her because of the stories the older mustang mares had told her back at the ranch and because of a memory she carried from the days when she roamed free. She remembered her lead stallion killing a young colt when she was but a small filly. She hadn't understood it at the time, but the colt had been another stallion's offspring. Now that she knew, she feared wild stallions even more. Hoping that maybe if she laid low none of the brutes would bother her, she moved away from the nearest stallion a bit and put her head down to graze on the nearly dead grass, keeping watch the entire time. If her solitude had granted her anything, it was a sharp eye and keen ears.

[manda]

Artemus wandered into Sunshine River as he was following a butterfly. He liked butterflies although he couldn't see them anymore. He had seen one once, a spotted one with delicate wings that had a dandelion yellow tint to them. Artemus did not see the butterflies anymore, but he still imagined them in his mind, he made each more beautiful then the next. Artemus could tell that there was a lone butterfly still hanging around by the faint sound made by it's fluttering wings. He walked behind it and pranced playfully.

Artemus kept prancing after the butterfly for a while before his legs got tired. He walked for a while longer before he accidently ran into a large object. He sniffed it and found out that the object was a mare that was smaller than him. He smiled and stepped back a bit. "Hello miss. Sorry I ran into you, but I have a bit of a problem with my eyes. My name is Artemus. What is your name?" He hoped that the mare wouldn't think of him as a threat or anything. He hoped he could find a friend in her.

[bullseye14]

Celeris skittered away from the white stallion frantically as he bumped into her. Her ears had been focused on a conversation between some horses several feet away from her and thus she hadn't noticed the stallion moving near her. She tried to regain her alert composure, so as not to be taken advantage of by the stallion, but knew her shaking legs would probably give her away. Her flattened ears slowly moved forward as she noticed the scars and white eyes the stallion bore. Only when she saw them did she recognize what he had said- he was blind. 'How does one talk to a blind horse?' she mentally asked herself as she watched the white stallion. 'By answering his question, of course,' a voice in the back of her mind answered.
"I'm uh," she cleared her throat. "I'm Celeris." The blank stare was unnerving, yet the notion that she had the upper hand was comforting to the roan mare. Not knowing what else to say, she sized the stallion up, running her eyes across his ivory body. She hadn't ever seen a horse with a dished face like his, nor had she ever seen one so tall. Fortunately, because she stood a decent distance away from the other equine, she didn't have to crane her neck to see his face; if she had been standing right in front of him, however, the aforementioned motion would have been necessary. She allowed silence to reign, lest the white steed think of a conversation to start. In the meantime, she eyed the other horses suspiciously, not wanting to be caught off guard again.

[manda]

Artemus heard the mare skitter away from him. He sighed, but stayed happy. "Hello Celeris. So, what brings you here?" Artemus smiled at her and lifted his muzzle to the air to smell for the water. He located the faint scent of water and walked over to the edge of the water. He lowered his muzzle to the water and took a few long drinks of it. He finished his drink and then followed the scent of the mare so that he was standing somewhere near her and facing her. He did not know what part of her he was facing, but he knew he was near her.

[bullseye14]

Celeris sidestepped so that she could continue to face the white stallion. She eyed him carefully as he lowered his head to drink and listened to him speak. The stallion seemed friendly enough, but the stories she had heard and the things that she remembered where enough to make her wary of the bigger equine.
"The water. I've spent a long time traveling in the desert. I just needed a break. I don't think I'll be here long, though." She looked into his scarred, yet kindly face. "What brings you here?" Copying his every question seemed like a good enough strategy. Unless he was known for asking inappropriate or prying questions, she doubted she could say anything wrong.
Her body urged her to take another drink, but moving closer to him just seemed to be too big of a risk. Her eyes trailed to the river and then back to the white stallion, waiting and watching.

[manda]

Artemus continued his blank stare into the blackness. He smiled at her. "Well, if you are here for water don't let me stop you. Go ahead and get a drink. I don't bite." Artemus chuckled a bit. "Even if I did bite without my vision I wouldn't be able to bite anyone." Artemus smiled at her. He wouldn't bite anyone even when threatened because of the surgery that those people did on his brain. "As for your question, I was following a butterfly. It would be wonderful to fly." If Artemus' presence was keeping Celeris from her drink then Artemus would wander away again and stay alone for even longer.

[bullseye14]

'Why is he being so nice to me?' Celeris thought to herself. What had she possibly done to deserve his kindness? They were simply two strangers drinking at the same spot in the river. Angling her body so that she could keep an eye on the other equine, she lowered her head to the river again. It seemed to her that she may never fully quench her thirst again. Lifting her head to look him in the eye again, she gave him a curious look. 'What horse dreams of flying? she wondered to herself. "How did you know you were following a butterfly?" she asked, regretting the question a moment later. 'Oh, I hope I don't make him mad...' she thought.

[manda]

Artemus smiled at Celeris when she decided to stay. He was glad that she would be staying at least for a short time. "I can feel and hear my surroundings. I heard the slight fluttering sound maade by its wings, so I knew it was a butterfly." Artemus felt a light snow start to fall on his pelt. He smiled, he loved the snow. "Don't you love the snow? So cool and refreshing." Artemus stuck out his tounge and caught a few snowflakes on his tounge. He smiled as the cool flakes hit his tounge and then melted. He put his tounge back in his mouth and layed down on the ground.

[bullseye14]

'Of course he can hear and feel his surroundings- just like you can. Silly horse! Why didn't you think of that?' Celeris thought. If she had been human, the roan would have blushed out of embarassment. She just couldn't seem to say the right things. 'Maybe I should just go and spare this poor horse more of my stupid questions,' the mare thought. But she couldn't seem to convince her legs to move. For some reason, her mind was greatly enjoying the company of another horse. Her herd mentality was kicking in and her craving for company was drastically increasing. She snorted and stamped her foot, somewhat irritated with herself for feeling that way.
A relatively aggressive shiver racked her body as snowflakes hit her red coat. Wandering in the desert had not allowed her to grow a thick winter coat. Sure, she was accustomed to freezing nights, but they weren't nearly as cold as the frozen rain.
"Yes, snow is most definitely cool," she replied. 'But I don't know about the refreshing part.' She stood silently, staring at the prone form of the white stallion. Why was he so nice and cheerful? Weren't stallions supposed to be dangerous and angry? "Are you so nice because you are blind?" Oh dear, there she went again, blurting another embarassing question out.

[manda]

Artemus smiled at Celeris. Other horses might have been offended by this, but his calm manner made him almost nothing like other horses in manner. "No, I am not nice because I am blind. I am nice because they did surgery on my brain. They removed part of it and it will not allow me to be agressive in any way or form." Artemus could feel a slight vibration through the ground as the mare shivered. "It is cold, would you like to lay down with me? It is much warmer with another horse to lie down with and while wandering in the desert I doubt that you grew a winter coat. You must be freezing." Artemus smiled and hoped that she would lie down with him. They both could use some extra body heat and company.

[Swede]

Cougar walked stiffly along the frozen ground. Cochise needed to learn basic social interaction without him around, because soon he would be doing a lot of it. Cougar was a dying mule, but he was the only one who knew it. It didn't bother him too much; it saddened him that his life had been one of almost constant pain, and Cochise would be heartbroken. But right now, his joints were acting up again and he was having trouble. His stride was shortened and his knees and hocks sore. But he was curious- he had heard those horses talking up ahead, and though generally horses seemed to be fairly naive creatures, vague words that had floated downstream caught his attention. So, he hobbled along, and called out, "Hello there, ye two. Mind if I join ye?"

[bullseye14]

(OOC: Posting Order:
Artemus
Cougar
Celeris)

The roan mare was eyeing the kindly white stallion with apprehension when the new horse joined them. She started and scooted away from him, moving closer to the now familiar white stallion. When her head was turned toward the newcomer and she was able to look into his face, she realized that this new stallion wasn't a horse at all. Or maybe he was... She couldn't tell. He had awfully long ears for a horse, though he was taller than she was. Had the kind, white horse been the bait in a trap? Maybe these two were working together. Her eyes flicked from one horse to another as her mind rapidly calculated the odds of escaping and running for a warmer, more vacant land.

[manda]

Artemus smiled as he heard the stallion approach them. He could tell a lot from his voice; stallion, up there in age, and a mule. "Hello there. I am Artemus. I don't mind if you join us, but that is up to Celeris." Artemus stood up and shook the snow from his white pelt. He nuzzled Celeris gently when he heard her shufflee away from the new arrival. He hoped that Celeris didn't mind him nuzzling her. He smiled at everyone and kept the blank stare in his eyes from his blindness.

[Swede]

Cougar snorted. "Don't stand there like a scared rabbit, ma'am." That's Cochise's job. "I'm just an old mule who won't last much longer. As far as I'm aware, Artemus is the only stallion here at the mo, and he don't seem the type to hurt ye. And what reason would you have to behave as though I'm a born monster? That job is for the humans." His voice cut off abruptly. He used to not mind those two-legged oddities much, but now he loathed them for their very existence. He shook himself out of his own selfish thoughts, and added, "And I'm Cougar. I suppose we're all introduced now, if I'm not sadly mistaken." He was a mule. He was blunt. He was dangerous only if you threatened him or his young nerve-shattered charge. Nothing more to it.

[bullseye14]

The roan's nostrils flared as her quickened breath burst in the form of foggy clouds from her nostrils. Her body had heated up enough from excitement now that the snow immediately melted as it hit her coat. Her skin flicked nervously as Artemus nuzzled her. Eyes flicking, she rapidly tried to understand who the two horses were. Being around one horse had been hard enough for her, being around two was alarming. The newcomer called himself a Mule. A mule named Cougar. What was a mule and why was he named after a great cat? He was brown and scarred and frighteningly direct. And... Wait, did he say humans were monsters?!
Celeris raised her head and puffed her chest out. "How can you call humans monsters? They've only ever cared for horses!" she snapped. This mule obviously had no idea what he was talking about.

[manda]

Artemus sighed at this. If he was a normal horse he would be shouting what he was about to say, but he could not show anger due to his surgery. He spoke with the blank look still on his face and his blind eyes staring into space. "Humans do not care for horses, some yes, but many others no. I am one of the horses they did not care for. They used me as a lab animal, the subject of many cruel experementations. They did surgery and many other horrible things to me. I must say that they are, as Cougar said, horrible monsters." Artemus sighed once again and continued to have a blank expression on his face. He flicked his pelt to rid it of the snow and then just stood there.

[Swede]

Cougar snorted angrily. "The stallion speaks truth. I myself suffered similar treatment for six years or more- time is blurred when ye never see the sun, standing in a metal stall- if you have the strength- hoping that the next cruel punishment will kill you. I-" he broke off. Why would he go spouting to this stranger about his own impending death? He was a mule, capable of lasting for decades, and here he was, kicking the bucket at sixteen. Or seventeen? Time was blurred. But his hesitation was only less than a second, and he continued smoothly, "I myself have fewer visible results. But let me describe something to ye." He paused, clearing his throat, hacking lightly. Then, he raised his whiskery face back, giving the mare a long look.

"Picture in yer head, a colt of about two years or there-abouts. Nothing special to look at, a chestnut pinto. Now, if he was born in the wild, ye could imagine him frolicking with fillies at this age, playing with his colt friends. Sounds normal and happy." His face hardened. "Lemme ruin that scene for ye. That colt is shaking like a leaf in a gale. His eyes are wild and frightened. He cannot see a thing out of his right eye. He is ugly as sin. An old burn on his left flank, as poor breathing as mine is, and scars lining up on his legs from where his tendons were slashed. And now who or what could have driven this colt halfway to insanity?" The last word of his rant was spat like something bitter on his tongue. "Humans." He motioned downstream. "And that colt is standing down there scared half ter death, per usual. His name is Cochise. And he spent half his life in that hellhole. A curse on all humans!" The mule's ears pinned flat. The mare was ignorant. He had met humans who were not so cruel, but they were nearly as awful due to the innate stupidity of their entire race, and a lack of compassion for the other races that existed on this earth.

[bullseye14]

Celeris didn't want to believe it, but why would the mule and the white stallion lie to her? What, other than humans, could possibly have left such ugly marks on their bodies and minds? She had been with the humans during the branding of cattles, smelled the burnt skin and fur and heard the frantic cries of the calves, but she had just believed that was part of life. When she thought about it, that must have been a painful and horrifying experience. The humans had intentionally scarred the bovines- for life. She slowly shook her head back and forth, trying to rid herself of the disloyal thoughts in her head. She wanted so badly for denial to set in, but it just wouldn't because to her, what the others said made sense. 'Oh, I never should have stopped here. I just should have kept going,' she thought. Her sorrowful eyes flicked from one horse to another. "My owner wasn't like that to me," she muttered.

[manda]

Artemus looked at Celeris and sighed. He knew that not all humans were bad. He had been around some nice humans before, like the ASPCA people, and the young girl. He sighed and wished that he could find the young girl again. "I two have once met nice humans. There was a group of nice humans that took me away from what the humans call a 'slaughter house'. It was a scary place where the mean people killed many horses and I was next to die. Those people took care of me and then I went to live with a nice pair of adult humans and a human filly. The human filly let me out to come into the wild. Those were the only nice humans though. Humans truely are strange creatures."

Artemus smiled at Cougar. "Have you ever met any nice humans?" He waited for someone to talk. He shook his head so his mane got out of his eyes.

[Swede]

Cougar's eyes softened a bit. "Nice? I don't know. Less cruel? Yes. Those who raised me were stupid idiots, with no idea of what on earth they wee doing, but their misdeeds weren't intentional. Not that it makes it any less heinous. If it weren't for them, I would have never existed." He sighed. That seemed a tempting thought at the moment. "And then I was sold. They were greedy and driven by profit, but at least us pack mules were given food and such, and never put in harm's way. Still, 'nice' isn't what I would call them. And then, what I just described to ye. And some others after that, but they too had their needles and things jabbing into me and Cochise, and I had had it up to here with those twoleggeds. So me and the colt, we busted out. And now we're here. And he's no better than before; I kinda pity him, the poor kid." Again, that sigh. He knew Cochise hated to be pitied. All the colt ever wanted was to be normal, to not be afraid, and pity set him apart from normal horses. The mule fixed his gaze on Celeris again. "Yer lucky, to have met nice people. I wish I could say the same."

[bullseye14]

Why had their owners hurt them so much while Celeris' had been kind and loving? Why had the cowboy taking a liking to Celeris and treated her with more respect than she had ever diserved while Cougar and Artemus had been dealt pain and suffering? The world did not make much sense to the poor, roan mare. A comfortable, clean stall, a nice bucket of grain and a hard days work were all she wanted and instead she had to struggle through the wild, starting at the sound of a coyote's howl and dealing without water and food for days on end. Should she stop pitying herself now that she knew others had it worse? Probably, but she wasn't capable of it. Looking out for and worrying about number one had been her mission in life for several years- why would that change? Survival of the fittest, they called it.
"Why is he no better than before?" she wondered aloud. "Because he has no one to take care of him?"

[manda]

Artemus sighed. "Poor kid. I too was tested as a foal, but there may be hope for Cochise. At least he made it out in time to have a chance at a normal life. I would like to meet him sometime. I am sure I would understand the young fellow." Artemus smiled at Celeris and Cougar. He spoke to Cougar. "I bet that he is no better than before because he is still suffering from the pain of the testing that the humans did, but I don't know for sure."

[Swede]

Cougar nodded. "Aye, that it is. His legs are still fragile, ye know, and he can't see a thing out of his eye and probably never will. And his breathing's no asset. It's hard to forget somethin like what we went through, especially when it follows you everyday. Too young fer such things. And as for someone to care for him, that would be me," he finished fiercely. He lived to protect Cochise. And anyone who believed otherwise would have to answer to him. Personally. Even as he spoke, his throat constricted and he began coughing horribly.

[bullseye14]

'Sounds to me like this other horse needs a human to take care of him.' Knowing it would be no good to speak those words out loud, Celeris kept them to herself. These horses obviously hated all humans and, despite the fact that she now realized that some humans were cruel, she knew there was at least one in the world that wasn't like that.
Though she didn't know much about the equine anatomy, she knew the coughing fit that suddenly enveloped the brown mule couldn't be good. The roan mare stood, simply staring at him, wondering what needed to be done. "M-maybe you should get a drink?" she quietly suggested.

[manda]

Artemus heard the mule begin to cough loudly. "Sir, I belive she is right. You need to get a drink." Artemus walked over to the mule and stood by his side. He could tell where he was going by sound and touch. "You need to stay strong for Cochise. Go get a drink and eat some food." Atremus waited for the mule to move. He wondered where he could get some leaves or something as long as it wasn't grass. He hated the taste of grass even though he was a horse.

[Swede]

The mule, still wheezing but not as severely, shook his head. "Water'll do me no good. Cochise has the same thing- something about one of the human tests, practically killed us the first time. And we can't shake the effects." Cougar sighed, uncharacteristically wistful. Just one more thing to hasten his impending death. For a long time now, he had felt an odd sort of ache in his gut, and it was spreading into his very bones. Soon, he knew not exactly when, but in the near future, it might overtake him. And then Cochise would be alone in the world, friendless and clueless. Well, Blessed Waters and Blue Wings might give him company, but they couldn't teach him what being a stallion meant. And that was what the colt needed- to learn how to cope with life in the wild. Besides, mares were fickle creatures and liable to change their minds at any moment. And the mule did not trust many stallions. No, his successor as Cochise's mentor would need to be a certain special someone, a someone he had yet to find.

[bullseye14]

Celeris watched the mule with pitying eyes. The poor creature had had it tough, that was for sure and it seemed his young charge, Cochise had dealt with no better. She couldn't help but to feel the need to nurture him and help him somehow, but from the way he talked, there was no helping him. "How awful," she whispered.
The mention of food made her stomach rumble- the mouthfuls of grass she had ripped up earlier had not been enough to fill her stomach. Dropping her crown back to the brown foliage, she took a few more mouthfuls, trying very hard to fill the empty spots residing in her stomach. She was used to sparse amounts of food, but she couldn't help longing for some thick, green grass.

[manda]

Atremus looked at the mule and spoke in a rather low tone. "What is going to happen to Cochise when you.. well.. when you pass on? I would gladly stick around with him untill I pass on also. The humans didn't affect my heart and lungs much." Atemus thought about when the humans had made him attach everything. He had hated that. It was aweful, but Cougar and Cochise seemed much worse off than he was. He would still live a few more years at least. He wondered if he would be able to meet Cochise sometime.

[Swede]

Cougar gave Celeris an odd look. "Awful is one way to put it," he said finally. At Artemus's words, the mule's whiskery muzzle snapped around, a fierce light gleaming in his eyes. "Who said anything about passin' on? We mules, though not as long-lived as our fathers, will outlast ye horses fer years. I might be sixteen, or older really, but for a mule, that's just 'bout middle-aged." As he spoke more passionately, his accent broadened and his voice grew more gruff. But then, the brightness in his eyes dimmed, and he shrugged. "But ye guessed right. I'm a dyin' mule. Ridiculous, to be dyin' at such a young age. That's what those humans'll do to ye." Tough old Cougar sighed dispiritedly. "I dunno what'll happen wi' Cochise. He's a good colt, and I'll stick around while I can. He don't know 'bout me, well, ye know. Prob' thinks I'll live forever. An' ye know, I get the impression he's real attached ter me. Dunno what he would do wi'out me, anyhow..." What would Cochise do? How would he be able to handle Cougar's passing? Cochise was the only thing the old mule cared for in life, having never raised a family and being denied the ability to do so. If it weren't for the colt, Cougar would probably have lain down somewhere peaceful and drifted off months ago. No, they needed each other, and Cochise was the only thing he would really miss when the time came.

[bullseye14]

Celeris felt like a spectator, which was fine by her. She didn't understand the ways of the wild just as these two horses didn't understand her love for her old master. Had she been a more normal mare, she would probably be leading the conversation, but she wasn't. In fact, there wasn't much of anything normal about the small group of equines. One was a mule, one was blind and she was a misfit. Did that make them interesting or freaks? Most horses would say 'What does it matter', but Celeris was not that type. She just wanted to fit in and she wondered if that would ever be possible out here in the wild- especially with this white stallion. His knowledge was that of cruelty and pain and hers that of comfort and compassion.
Another shiver racked the poor mare's body and she instinctively moved closer to the white stallion, appreciating the warmth coming from his body. Was there anywhere in this land that could shelter her from the wretched snow?